It's an ad, ad, ad, ad world

Cowboy hat By Jim Hightower - Mon., 7/1/02

Lily Tomlin said, “I worry that the man who invented Muzak might be thinking of inventing something else.”

Unfortunately, that’s a worry come true. A company with the vaguely threatening name of Captivate Network Inc. has come up with a way to make your elevator ride much more annoying than a Muzak moment. Thanks to advances in wireless technology, it is now possible for outfits like Captivate to fill your 30-second ride with advertising videos. Yes, as you glide up for another day’s work in your cubicle, you can be blessed by a yammering pitch for Right Guard, Starbucks or Rolaids.

Elevator ads are merely the tip of the iceberg for the so-called “Outernet industry.” They’re targeting doctors’ offices, movie lobbies, commuter trains, convenience stores—even ski lifts! Already Wal-Mart, Best Buy, and 7-Eleven are putting out-of-home advertising screens in their stores.

The possibilities are endless—taxis, restrooms, golf tees, public parks, boardwalks at the seashore. They literally can install this technology in tree trunks or on fences, so we need never be more than a few seconds from the next pitch.

The head of one Outernet firm claims they’re doing us a favor: “If you’re standing in line waiting for a Big Mac . . . you’ve got nothing else to do.” Wrong! We could think beautiful thoughts, take tiny yoga breaks or plot revenge against the crass commercializers of our world.



Filed Under: Corporate greed