Hightower Lowdown

It's bad enough that food scientists have used genetic manipulation to create dangerous Frankenfoods, but now they've definitely gone too far: They're messing with Mexican food. I bring you two alarming examples from the government-funded laboratories at Texas A&M University.

First, a scientist there has created a low-heat habanero pepper. Yoo-hoo, professor— the whole idea of the habanero is that it's the gold standard of what a ridiculously hot pepper should be.

But, cries the professor, with our new, meek habanero, all the people who shy away from the heat can now eat one. Yoo-hoo, again—there are hundreds of varieties of peppers, all with varying degrees of hot. You want meek? Eat a pimento.

Meanwhile, another prof at A&M is messing with the simple, fresh-every-day tortilla. To please corporate distributors, he's created a flour tortilla that will stay "fresh" without refrigeration for more than a month...perhaps up to four years.

How many people are thinking that what America really needs is a non-hot habanero and a tortilla that'll last four years? And how many of us think this is what our tax-supported scientists should be working on?